30 Mar. 2008

Where is my home?

Recently I blurted out a comment to two friends, something along the lines of:
"I would leave Mount Gambier in a flash"
A comment I received then was something like:
"not too soon I hope"

I didnt give much of an answer then, but have pondered over the comment I made.

It is not that I hate Mount Gambier, it is just that I dont feel like it is my home.
Then I think, well, where is my home?
I cant answer.
I cant think of anywhere that I have lived in my 35 years as being my home.
I have lived in soooo many places, but Mount Gambier is the town that I have lived the longest.

I realised that in reality my home is not here.

The oft said quote is "home is where the heart is"
and my heart is with my boys, and we are here,
but still there is no contentment here.

I dont mean that I am not happy here, I guess I see here as only where God wants me to be at the moment.

Is it my legs that are restless? Is it because I spent most of my growing years moving from one town and parent to another? Is it because it feels inbuilt in me to not stay anywhere too long and I have an unconscious need to keep moving?

No I have thought well about it...

I know my home is in eternity with God, in the house that Jesus has prepared in advance for me to dwell in with Him, when He comes back to take me to be with Him.

So my home is where my heart is, and my heart is with Jesus, and Jesus is in Heaven, sitting at the right hand of God my Heavenly Father.

And at this very moment, with all my little spastic emotions running riot, I am longing very much to be with my Heavenly Father, so I can sit on His knee and cry.

But then, will there be any tears in heaven?
Maybe only tears of Joy!

For now though, I think my God has other plans for me, no doubt to continue what I have started, and be the Mother to my Boys who are the sunshine in my days.


  1. I agree with what you say and have a similar experience of wanting to be 'home', even though I'm happy here.


  2. I liked your poem.

    It describes how we live in the tension of the past,the now and the not yet. The yearning of the heart for the known and unknown.

    Thanks craig

  3. Ive had the same growing up experiance, moo-bile farmers(mooo-ving every other year) and splitup parents.
    living in WA 1000's of miles away from family, but Mt Gambier is diferent.....
    It took me 6 month to accept, but this is my home (blokes and chicks thnk diferently so bear/beer/bare with me), its not that the city(ha) has loads to offer (shops are good, things to do plenty), its not the weather (I like it cold), it IS my church family. I have never had friends like I have here, they are all different, all flawed (some only just barely) and all crazy, but they show everyone love as Jesus instructed, a glass of water here, a load of wood there, I know this is home cause I feel safe here, protected by an army of Jesus warriors, if I cry help! they pick up there swords (chainsaws, shovels, utes' BBQ's)and charge (garden, build, cook and hug)without hessitation. And they also let me return the blessings when i can. This church is truly full of my Brothers and Sisters in Christ. Ive not had this at any other church ive been too, plenty of God praising, plenty of fun having, but not 'one an other loving so the world may know your mine'. Mt gambier is as close to Home as it can get for me.

    your bro