12 Nov. 2007

The wolf in sheep's clothing!

Matthew 7:15-19 (NIV)
15"Watch out for false prophets. They come to you in sheep's clothing, but inwardly they are ferocious wolves. 16By their fruit you will recognize them. Do people pick grapes from thornbushes, or figs from thistles? 17Likewise every good tree bears good fruit, but a bad tree bears bad fruit. 18A good tree cannot bear bad fruit, and a bad tree cannot bear good fruit. 19Every tree that does not bear good fruit is cut down and thrown into the fire.

Now more than ever before I know what this passage means. I have been struggling a lot of late; I know that it began when I met the Wolf in Sheep’s Clothing. Only this time, the wolf was dressed as my “prince charming” (of sorts).
I’ll not go into many details, but, he said all the right things (in the beginning), as if he knew all the right buttons to push, and knew how to make the most of my vulnerability and trusting nature. Whether he set out to accomplish what he did, I don’t know. Maybe he was a victim of the devil’s schemes as well?? Maybe. Even the devil can quote bible passages and pretend!!!
In the end though, I could no longer deny the sins in his life, and the sins I was committing through association with him.
I realised that he was not going to stop anytime soon, while I was seeing him. I realised that despite my ultimatum, I was as good as condoning his sin by being with him! So I called it off. I thought maybe for a short time, but as the following 2 weeks passed, many things were revealed to me by God and by those closest to me.
I reflected on our relationship and realised the amount of lies that came from his mouth! My dad then revealed that the “wolf” had made a derogatory remark to my Dad’s ex-girlfriend (who I am close to) and then proceeded to put the hard word on her!!! As to why they didn’t tell me when it happened I have NO_IDEA! It would have saved me a further two months of crap with a lying drug addicted selfish hypocrite! He is nothing like the man I knew 16years ago!
Yes I am Angry!! I have nightmares over it still and its been nearly 2 months since I spoke to him. What is painful, tho is that he lives only 2 houses away from me and I hear his distinctive sounding vehicle drive many times a day!
I want to yell at him and scream at him!!! But I am also afraid to. He is a strong man. It is as if he still has some hold over me!
I’m ranting I know but I gotta get it out of me. Its eating me!
I’ve asked God’s forgiveness, but I can’t break free of how dirty and used and hurt I feel.
How could I be so deceived?
Now I know, reading the above passage... You can tell them by their fruits!!!!!
Please Lord let me not be so blind again!!!!!

2 comments:

  1. Amen Karen! It takes great courage to put your heart in such a public place, but it is your place to vent as you like, and if this is where you can do it, then go right ahead! My wallpaper changed this morning to Romans 8:37-39, and I immediately thought of you - nothing you could do could separate Him from you, there is nothing you can do to make Him stop loving you. NOTHING!!! The sermon we had yesterday reminded me again how God can use the hurt and chaos in our lives for His purposes, and I have no doubt that this situation you're dealing with will bear fruit. You are His child, His creation, and by His doing He will allow the good fruit to bear from you, whom He loves! Keep going to the Word, the living, breathing Word that will sustain you, even when it seems He is very far away. Often it is those times He is closest. Thanks for sharing, dear friend.

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  2. hey kaz! I'm so sorry you're hurting like that. I love what stickingmum said. You are God's daughter and His princess. He delights in you! You've asked Him for forgiveness and He has granted that... and now you have to have some grace with yourself to be free of the wolf! The Lion is so much stronger than the wolf, my friend, my sister in Christ!

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